Preparing For Marriage.
Does your heart long to marry? Do you sometimes look at your friends who have wedded and wonder, when will it be my turn?
If you’ve been waiting a long time for the one to show up, it can be easy to grow discouraged, or even be tempted to settle on someone who’s less than the one you had hoped for.
Rather than making a list of what you hope your spouse will be like, how about you make a chart of what would make you the spouse of someone else’s dreams?
While it’s not wrong to day dream about the character qualities of your perfect mate, don’t spend so much time with your head in the clouds that you miss the opportunity to let the Lord mold you in you Christ-like qualities that will help you be a better mate.
With this goal in mind, let’s visit a few of the things you can do while preparing yourself for marriage – even before you are dating.
Learn To Love Selfless
To prepare yourself to be a wonderful spouse you must learn how to love others with Christ’s selfless love. The longer a person remains single, the easier it is for them to settle in their own self-focused ways––which can cause a lifetime of conflict in marriage.
Jesus said the priority of life is to love God with all of your being. And the second most important commandment is to love others as we love ourselves (see Mark 12:30-31). The secret to becoming a spouse who loves well lies in learning to love God with your heart, soul, mind and strength.
But don’t wait until you’re married to grow your love for God. When your life’s purpose is to love Him with all of your being, then He will give you His supernatural ability to love others with His selfless love. And loving well is the key to a happy marriage.
In our many years as biblical marriage counselors, my husband and I have yet to see marriage trouble in a couple who makes loving God their highest priority––because their love for Christ selflessly pours out onto their mate.
But, how do you learn to love selflessly? You must spend time with God through prayer, reading the Bible and fellowship with others who deeply love Him. If as a single person you don’t make time now to fall more in love with Jesus, I can almost guarantee you’ll not find the time to do so once you’re sharing your life with a spouse––and family.
To love selflessly requires humility and willingness to lay down your entitlement attitudes. Serving others is the sweetest display of selfless love and one of the most precious qualities of a godly spouse.