HOW DO I FORGIVE?
Before we answer this question, let us understand what forgiveness is all about
Forgiveness simply means the willingness of an individual to let go of thoughts and feelings of anger, bitterness, retribution and vengeance towards the other person who has done wrong to us.
We all appreciate being forgiven, but forgiving others, especially when they have wounded us, feels like a different thing. Emotions get involved. We decide they need to suffer for the hurt they’ve caused, and we delay offering forgiveness, sometimes for years, decades, or forever.
How do i forgive someone who wronged me?
Getting Even Instead of Forgiving
When we hurt, we want the person who is the source or that wound to hurt as much as we do. But the Bible provides a different perspective.
“Dear friends, never avenge yourselves. allow God to do it, for he has declared that he will pay those who merit it. Don’t take the law into your own hands” (Romans 12:19TLB).
Forgiving Those Who Don’t Ask for Forgiveness
As Jesus suffered on the cross, he asked God to forgive those who wrongly condemned him to death. Often those who offend us never ask for our forgiveness or admit any wrong-doing. Forgiving these people is perhaps the hardest. But Jesus is our example for forgiving those who don’t appear to be sorry or ask to be forgiven.
“Father, forgive t hem for they do not know what they are doing” (Mark 11:25 NIV).
The one who forgives an offense seeks love, but whoever repeats a matter separates close friends” (Proverbs 17:9 NET).
While it may seem forgiving others is to their advantage, you are really the one who benefits most. Unforgiveness raises rage, and the outcome of internal rage is sadness. When you choose to forgive others, you give yourself a gift. Once you decide to forgive, you can move on with your life instead of stagnating in hurt and resentment, and in forgiving, you mirror a forgiving God.
When you pardon those who offend you, your heavenly Father will pardon you. But when you reject to pardon others, your Father will not pardon your iniquities (Matthew 6: 14-15 NLT).
Grant each other’s mistakes, and pardon anybody who upsets you. Recall, the Lord pardoned you, therefor you need to pardon others” (Colossians 3:13 NLT).
“Be compassionate and concerned to each other, tolerating one another, just as Christ pardoned you” (Ephesians 4:32 NIV).
Asking for Forgiveness
It’s easier to recognize sin in others, than to see it in ourselves. Pride gets in the way, and often, we make excuses for our actions. But the Bible tells us unconfused sin and unforgiveness block our relationship with God.
So, when you are presenting your appreciation at the altar and instantly recollect that your colleague or fellow has something countering you, abandon your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be settle with them; then come and present your appreciation (Matthew 5:23-24 NIV).
If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9 KJV).
“In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace” (Ephesians 1:7 NIV).
“Therefore, my friends, I want you to know that through Jesus the forgiveness of sins is proclaimed to you” (Acts 13:38 NIV).
“The Lord our God is merciful and forgiving, even though we have rebelled against him” (Daniel 9:9 NIV).
“O Lord, you are so good and kind, so ready to forgive, so full of mercy for all who ask your aid” (Psalm 86:5 TLB).